Only way is up, right?
I am almost 40 years old and am living in my parents basement. Yeah, the thought is that I will save money and be able to buy my own place but it still stings being an adult that is living in their parents home.
Christmas for the kids and their dad was up in the air until the last minute. There was an issue because the kids dad felt that it was his mother and sister's (the hosts of Christmas) responsibility to make sure I was aware I wasn't invited/welcome for Christmas at his sisters house. I had not planned on being at the Christmas get together. The plan that had been discussed was that I would drop the kids off with dad and dad would transport the kids to his sisters house. I didn't think I had to blatantly say that I was going home after dropping the kids off or that I was not going to his sisters house after I dropped the kids off.
The kids grandmother sent me a text on Christmas eve stating "Hello Heather, Danielle and I have talked it over and feel that it is best if only one of us attends Christmas at Danielle's. Since I am her mother, I believe the choice is clear that it is me. I'm sorry for any inconvenience this may cause. Merry Christmas. -Linda". I responded with "I was never coming to Suzie's for xmas this year. Jeff and I are not together so there is no reason for me to be included."
The plan ended up being that I would drive the children to their aunts house and they would have dinner and open gifts, then head back to grandma's house to open gifts from their dad and grandfather that is out of state. I would pick up the younger kids so that they could do their things on the 26th.
I dropped the younger kids off at their aunts house with the oldest child in the car. The oldest child did not get acknowledged by their aunt. The oldest has been in these peoples lives for 14 years. It is not right to exclude her. I am hoping she is not being excluded because of me again. Years ago she was excluded by grandmother's cousin after I argued with grandmother about money. Oldest child and I have not received a gift from the cousin since.
When I picked up the kids, their dad had been drinking and I am pretty sure had taken anxiety meds for being at his sisters place. I was helping get things in the back of the car, Jeff said that he knows we are not together but it still hurt to see it in the text and asked for a hug and I obliged, then he kissed me. I pulled away, told him Merry Christmas and walked back to my my car door. He was walking back to the sidewalk and I asked if there were any gifts for the oldest child I should bring back with me, turns out there were none.
I feel like I should get the oldest child gifts from the grandparents and aunt. I do not want to see her hurt because of insensitive arseholes. On the other hand, if she sees them as the arseholes they are then the hurt and grieving can commence much sooner. I think the recovery time would be better also.
Christmas ended up mostly ok. I was worried that my child would blow their top at the family function so I was anxiously waiting for a phone call to come get him. Instead he was extra wound up by being around his half brother, opening gifts and eating candy. When I did pick him up he was super excited about some of his gifts and did not want to share them with his baby sister. She was ok with not sharing his gifts but he still yelled at her and myself about the fact that he was not going to share.
Christmas for the kids and their dad was up in the air until the last minute. There was an issue because the kids dad felt that it was his mother and sister's (the hosts of Christmas) responsibility to make sure I was aware I wasn't invited/welcome for Christmas at his sisters house. I had not planned on being at the Christmas get together. The plan that had been discussed was that I would drop the kids off with dad and dad would transport the kids to his sisters house. I didn't think I had to blatantly say that I was going home after dropping the kids off or that I was not going to his sisters house after I dropped the kids off.
The kids grandmother sent me a text on Christmas eve stating "Hello Heather, Danielle and I have talked it over and feel that it is best if only one of us attends Christmas at Danielle's. Since I am her mother, I believe the choice is clear that it is me. I'm sorry for any inconvenience this may cause. Merry Christmas. -Linda". I responded with "I was never coming to Suzie's for xmas this year. Jeff and I are not together so there is no reason for me to be included."
The plan ended up being that I would drive the children to their aunts house and they would have dinner and open gifts, then head back to grandma's house to open gifts from their dad and grandfather that is out of state. I would pick up the younger kids so that they could do their things on the 26th.
I dropped the younger kids off at their aunts house with the oldest child in the car. The oldest child did not get acknowledged by their aunt. The oldest has been in these peoples lives for 14 years. It is not right to exclude her. I am hoping she is not being excluded because of me again. Years ago she was excluded by grandmother's cousin after I argued with grandmother about money. Oldest child and I have not received a gift from the cousin since.
When I picked up the kids, their dad had been drinking and I am pretty sure had taken anxiety meds for being at his sisters place. I was helping get things in the back of the car, Jeff said that he knows we are not together but it still hurt to see it in the text and asked for a hug and I obliged, then he kissed me. I pulled away, told him Merry Christmas and walked back to my my car door. He was walking back to the sidewalk and I asked if there were any gifts for the oldest child I should bring back with me, turns out there were none.
I feel like I should get the oldest child gifts from the grandparents and aunt. I do not want to see her hurt because of insensitive arseholes. On the other hand, if she sees them as the arseholes they are then the hurt and grieving can commence much sooner. I think the recovery time would be better also.
Christmas ended up mostly ok. I was worried that my child would blow their top at the family function so I was anxiously waiting for a phone call to come get him. Instead he was extra wound up by being around his half brother, opening gifts and eating candy. When I did pick him up he was super excited about some of his gifts and did not want to share them with his baby sister. She was ok with not sharing his gifts but he still yelled at her and myself about the fact that he was not going to share.
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